The Comfy Canine

Lumber Bear

I was hiking through the forest one day all alone when all of a sudden I felt a sharp sting across the back of my head, and then everything went black. When I came about I knew something was different. I felt about 3 ft taller, and 600lbs heavier. I had been turned into a HUGE Lumber Bear. I couldn't figure out how, but I guessed that a witch doctor had jumped out and hit me with a magic stick, so that's what I'm sticking with. So being this gigantic bear I suddenly had the urge to start pushing over trees, and so that's what I started doing. Once I had about 10 trees knocked down I had to stop and take a break. Then some idiot photographer comes along, and catches me with my tongue hanging out and thought it was funny. So I found it pretty hilarious when he was screaming like a little girl while I bit off his arms and legs. No I'm just kidding, but I did chase him around and whack him around a little. Next thing I know I'm passed out in my cave, and go into a deep hibernation, only to wake up and be human again. Don't ask me, just a crazy day in the woods I guess?